I have a feeling,
That in the end of time as we now know it, 
When all things are revealed in their completeness,
We will discover,
That the only differences between us, 
Were... like the spectrum of light,
That radiates from a perfectly cut diamond, 
The subtle variations in how each of us manifested,
The many Reflections of GOD.

It is difficult to give up the “me” in Life. To not want credit for the things I feel I have accomplished… things that set me apart from others and make me think I am just a little better than them. I have tried many ways to get rid of my ego but, to no avail. Like a rubber ball, it always comes bouncing back to me. Even in long group meditations I sometimes feel a bit of satisfaction if I have sat a little longer than others, especially if I have done so without farting or drawing attention to myself in some way during the exercise.

I would assume that I am not the only one who has this problem, although I can’t say that anyone has ever brought it up in a conversation before… or maybe they don’t see it as a problem, which makes me question why I do. Perhaps, well no, for certain it is because of my upbringing in a white evangelical environment. I have over the years witnessed the damage well-meaning Christians have done to what they perceive to be heathen cultures and I regret that I was once a part of that movement, the same movement that today marches behind the colorless flag of supremacy.

To imagine myself a shimmering light amid a spectrum of other lights just as radiant as my own is now my goal in Life… for all that has Life is likened to the diamond through which God reveals Himself.